10 Questions Every Expat Parent Has (and the Expat Parenting Answers You’ve Been Searching For)

Moving to a new country as an expat parent is exciting but can also be daunting. Along with the adventure comes a range of concerns about your child’s well-being, education, and emotional development. Though it may feel uncertain at first, you’re not alone in navigating these challenges.

We consulted Robbie Zein, an educational and behavioral consultant and founder of AskZein, to provide insights into the common issues expat parents face. Below are the 10 top questions expat parents often have and Robbie’s expert insights to guide you.

1. What are the fears and concerns of expat parents when moving to a new country?

Parents often worry about their child’s safety and well-being during an international move. Robbie Zein explains that this often manifests as:

“The safety of my child… how do I minimize the damage during this transition and how do I maximize the joy and the growth?”

While these fears are understandable, Robbie highlights that each challenge provides growth opportunities. Both parents and children can develop resilience and adaptability through the experience with understanding and positive reinforcement. Try to remember that the transition can be a gift that helps your child grow stronger.

2. How does moving to a new country affect my child’s emotional development? Am I making my child anxious?

Frequent moves can affect a child’s emotional development, but they can also help children become more adaptable. Children who move often learn to adjust quickly, make new friends, and handle change. Robbie notes:

“They will constantly, just like any other human being, moving or not moving, be faced by challenges, but they have to deal with their emotions”

Balancing emotional support with practical concerns like housing and schooling is key. Robbie adv

ises parents to nurture their child’s emotional health and be open to them processing their feelings during transitions.

3. How do I balance my family’s cultural identity with integration into a new culture?

Many expat parents worry about losing their cultural identity while integrating into a new culture. Robbie explains:

“I find the fear is more pronounced when the culture is different.” (For example, a family from Bangladesh moving to the Netherlands.)

While maintaining cultural values is important, Robbie encourages parents to strike a balance. Children can embrace their heritage while also learning to appreciate the culture around them. This balance helps create a multifaceted identity that can benefit them long term.

4. How can I help my child adjust to a new language and culture?

One of the biggest challenges for expat parents is helping their child adjust to a new language and culture. Robbie reassures parents that children usually pick up languages quickly. Creating a warm, supportive environment is key:

“Smile as much as you can while you’re teaching…Smile and giggle. Because body language with that love…it’s so comforting.”

Patience, encouragement, and reassurance will ease the transition, making the experience less intimidating and more joyful for your child.

5. What should I consider when choosing a school for my child?

When choosing a school, consider the stability of the teaching staff, the curriculum, and the overall quality of care. Robbie suggests asking questions such as:

“How long are teachers staying?”

“How frequently do new staff arrive?”

“What is the quality of care and curriculum?”

She stresses that because children face constant change when moving, it’s important for them to feel like their school environment is stable. Visiting schools in person when possible can also help you gauge whether they align with your values and expectations for your child’s education and well-being.

6. How can I address my fear about my child’s well-being in a new country?

It’s natural to worry about your child’s well-being, but managing your own emotions will better equip you to support your child. Robbie emphasizes:

“It’s really about self-care.”

When you feel calm and confident, your child will feel more secure. Take time for self-care and practice positive language to model healthy coping strategies. The more grounded you are, the better equipped you’ll be to help your child feel confident in their new environment.

7. How do I cope with feelings of guilt or sadness when moving my child abroad again?

Saying goodbye to friends, schools, and familiar places can bring feelings of guilt and sadness. Robbie acknowledges:

“There’s a lot of guilt and sadness when we’re moving again because there are so many goodbyes.”

However, she encourages parents to lean into these emotions. It’s okay to feel sad, but also focus on the excitement of new beginnings. Robbie suggests:

“Laugh and enjoy the [goodbye] parties…Cry and be sad and grieve…Prepare for the new country…and talk about how exciting it will be when you arrive.”

Processing emotions together as a family can help ease the transition and shift focus to the positive aspects of the move.

8. How can I build confidence as a parent when preparing for a move abroad?

Confidence as a parent starts with addressing your own fears. Robbie explains:

“I think the answer is always going to be the same, addressing the fear…”

Recognizing that your fears are normal (and that you’re not alone!) is the first step to overcoming them. Preparation and support are also essential. Research your destination, connect with other expat families, and create a practical plan to ensure stability for your child. Additionally, see the move as an opportunity for growth—for both you and your child.

9. How do I address my child’s behavior when they act out after moving?

Stress from moving can manifest as challenging behaviors. Robbie advocates using a guidance system based on natural consequences:

“Every action in life has a consequence. And that’s a very important lesson to teach children early in life.”

Instead of reacting with frustration, focus on teaching accountability while maintaining your child’s self-esteem. Robbie advises:

“My voice doesn’t now elevate. I don’t start screaming…because when you come in with this negative emotion and you start yelling, the child then takes it personally.”

This approach helps children learn from their behavior without feeling personally attacked.

10. As a parent, how do I help my family navigate

cultural or religious differences when we move to a new country?

Cultural and religious differences can be challenging, but Robbie points out that in many secular countries, these concerns may not be as prominent:

“I don’t get those questions. Isn’t that beautiful?”

Expat parents who have lived in multiple countries often develop a broader sense of identity. Robbie reflects on her own experience:

“I belong to all of them and then some. I am a human from this planet. And my country is Earth.”

This broader perspective can help families navigate cultural differences more fluidly, fostering a sense of belonging regardless of location.

Moving Forward

Being an expat parent presents both challenges and incredible opportunities for growth. By addressing your child’s fears, nurturing their emotional well-being, and balancing practical and emotional support, you can better support your child as they adjust to life abroad. For more tips on expat parenting, check out AskZein, and for insights and stories about thriving as an expat, check out our other articles here on Expat Republic.